Lycan Christmas Read online

  “I do it all the time.” She scooted closer to him. He took a step back, and she frowned.

  “I have to go.”

  “Wait! Did I do something?”

  He shook his head. “No. I just have to go.”

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  “O-Okay. Happy Thanksgiving, Lorent. I’ll see you Monday for our lesson?”

  He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment before nodding, then made his way back inside and to the kitchen. Melony looked so damned gorgeous tonight. He wondered if she had any clue how she affected him. He loved everything about her: her pink hair, creamy skin, chocolate eyes, and love for funky clothes. And how often had he fantasized about that damned navel piercing since she’d told him about it? About every two seconds or so that he was conscious.

  He had done well tonight. He’d hung out longer with everyone than he usually did at these get-togethers, and honestly? He’d kind of enjoyed it, but now he was about to undo all the progress he’d made with his hasty departure. At this point, he wasn’t sure he cared. He had to put some distance between him and Melony before he did something stupid like kiss her in front of everyone. He didn’t think an ass-kicking on Thanksgiving would bode well for the holiday, and he didn’t want to ruin all of the hard work everyone had gone to for the dinner.

  He was almost to the front door when a huge commotion broke out in the back of the house. He froze and turned to see what was going on. Holy shit. Had Reid and Reilly actually pulled their prank on Brent? On Thanksgiving? The two had been allowed to attend the dinner since they were well along in their training. Besides, even those two wouldn’t be naive enough to try something with all of the ancients in attendance—at least he thought so until now.

  Two seconds later, Brent stormed down the hallway with a scowl on his face and scanned the crowd, immediately honing in on the twins.

  “You two! Over here. Now!” He pointed at Reid and Reilly and then to the floor in front of him.

  At this point it was becoming obvious to everyone what had happened.

  Reid and Reilly’s practical joke had worked, although by the looks of it, Brent wasn’t happy that the snap ball firecrackers under the toilet seat had met with his ass.

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  Reid and Reilly shuffled over to Brent, heads down like two adolescents about to be scolded by their father, which wasn’t all that far from the truth.

  Lorent had to admit, the joke was funny, and the chuckles, giggles, and smiles were good indications that everyone else was getting a kick out of it as well.

  Once the twins were standing in front of Brent, he folded his arms across his broad chest.

  “It was his idea!” Reid and Reilly pointed at one another and spoke at the exact same time.

  “Was not!” Again said in perfect unison, followed by glares at one another.

  “Enough!” Brent said loudly, and the two quieted instantly.

  “I know the both of you well enough to be certain that you each had an equal part in it. Tomorrow, you’ll both clean this place up, and then you will both do night patrol for the next two weeks.”

  “C’mon!” Reid and Reilly said together.

  “Don’t argue with me.”

  The twins looked at the floor before mumbling, “Yes, sir.”

  “You can go back to the party now, but any more shenanigans, and you’re out of here.”

  They mumbled, “Yes, sir,” again.

  “By the way,” Brent said, “great joke.”

  Reid and Reilly turned and smiled wide grins at him.

  “You better watch your asses, though, because paybacks are a bitch.”

  Brent whistled as he walked toward the others.

  “Aw man!” Reilly smacked Reid on the shoulder. “Told ya.”

  “Yeah, whatever. It was still funny.”

  They both grinned again and made their way toward the food.

  Lorent grinned too. Things were going to start getting interesting around here, that was for sure. He shook his head as he closed the door behind him, suddenly feeling the cold more than usual. He was perplexed when he realized he was actually regretting the fact that he was leaving. That had never happened to him before. Usually, he couldn’t get away from a group of 101

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  people fast enough, but he didn’t feel like that tonight. He wanted to be a part of the group. What had brought that about?

  He shook his head in bewilderment and started toward his cabin. The night was dark, and the snow was getting deeper. The thick feel of the air told him that the storm was not likely to let up anytime soon. He didn’t mind. The snow brought an air of calm, an air of purity to the land. It covered the earth in a temporary blanket of innocence.

  “Lorent?”

  He was tempted to ignore her and keep walking, but Shannon was persistent if nothing else. He turned and watched as she hurried toward him.

  Her white coat nearly swallowed her whole.

  “Yes?”

  She was breathing a bit hard by the time she got to him. “I wanted to tell you Happy Thanksgiving.”

  “You shouldn’t have come after me for that. It’s cold out here. Go back to Brent and Rindy’s.”

  She gave her trademark pout, and he wanted nothing more than to get as far away from her as fast as he could.

  “I wanted to give you something as well.”

  “Why would you give me anything?” He raised a brow in question.

  She smiled, and before he realized what she’d meant, she stood on tiptoe and placed her mouth against his. He immediately pulled away from her, and she scowled.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked.

  He sighed. This was not going to go well, but it was time for him to set her straight about his feelings for her. “Shannon, I like you, but only as a friend.”

  “I knew it!” She balled her hands into angry fists.

  “Knew what?” What the hell was she talking about?

  “It’s because of her, isn’t it?”

  “Who? What’s because of who?”

  “Melony. Until she came along, we were fine, and now she’s sashayed in here like a princess and come between you and me.”

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  He held his hands up. “Whoa. Wait a minute. I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but I’ve never felt anything more for you than friendship, and I never will. That is, and will remain, the truth whether Melony was here or not. I’m sorry. I’ve tried to make it clear that I wasn’t interested in you that way.”

  “But I thought I was your mate and you were just too shy to admit it.”

  Her bottom lip quivered.

  He shook his head. Good God, had she really thought that? He tried hard to recall any time that he may have given her any indication that she was his mate, and was certain he never had.

  “No. You are not my mate.”

  “But I was so sure.” Fat tears slid down her cheeks.

  Son of a bitch. He felt more uncomfortable now than he had at any gathering. She threw her arms around his waist and sobbed against his chest.

  He placed his hands on her shoulders and patted her on the back, not sure exactly what to do with her. Before he could figure it out, a sound behind Shannon caught his attention, and he found Melony standing behind her, watching them, her mouth set in what he could only describe as an angry line. Shit.

  He gently removed himself from Shannon’s embrace and started for Melony, but she took two steps away from him, and he stopped.

  “Melony,” he whispered.

  “I-I’m sorry for interrupting.” She turned away, but he caught her by the arm.

  “It isn’t what you think,” he whispered close to her ear, and even in the middle of this uncomfortable misunderstanding couldn’t help but breathe in her scent and savor it.

  “It�
��s okay. It’s not a big deal.” She tried to break away from him, but he refused to relinquish his hold. “Let go of me, please.”

  “Shannon was upset. That’s all. I was—”

  “I don’t want to hear it. I’ll see you Monday.” She looked down at his fingers gripping her arm. “Let me go.”

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  Maybe this was best. Maybe this was the only way he could keep from hurting her since he’d been failing miserably at controlling himself around her. If she thought the worst of him, she would no longer trust him. She’d no longer welcome his advances. The problem with that scenario was the hurt that now shined in her eyes was like a dagger to his heart. He wanted to make her listen, explain what had happened, make her understand, but this could be his only chance to make sure he didn’t hurt her even worse down the line.

  He nodded and let her go. She stuffed her hands into her pockets and slowly started back toward the cabin with her head down and shoulders slumped. A few steps later, her back straightened and her head was held high.

  The newly found determination in her steps made him smile at her retreating back even though his chest ached at the loss. She was strong, and she had refused to let him see how much he’d upset her. That was his woman. No.

  She isn’t for you.

  Shannon sniffed behind him, and he turned back to face her. “Go back to the cabin, where it’s warm.”

  He was surprised when she nodded and started off in the same direction as Melony without argument. He doubted he’d understand women even if he lived a thousand years, but again, there was only one woman he’d met that he wanted to understand, and he’d just ruined his chances with her.

  * * * *

  Melony was miserable. She couldn’t believe she’d gone after Lorent only to find Shannon in his arms. How had she been so wrong, so blind about something, about someone? Had he been playing with her the whole time?

  Had he thought her attraction to him amusing? No. She refused to believe that. No one could fake the kind of chemistry they had between them, or had it all been one-sided?

  When she had gotten back to Brent and Rindy’s cabin, she’d put on a good show of being happy for the rest of the dinner and then excused herself to go home. Rose had insisted Knox walk her home, and now she was glad to be curled up in her own warm bed with Puss, wallowing in her self-pity 104

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  party while the snowstorm blew furiously outside. She was thankful she’d thought to put an electric blanket on her list since she’d always been cold natured, and reached up to turn the controller up another notch.

  Tomorrow she’d see if the Internet was working at the Learning Center—she wasn’t counting on it, especially if the storm continued throughout the night—to check the status of the order she’d placed for the hair supplies. She doubted the items had been shipped with the holiday and all, but it would give her something to do to whittle away some of her time.

  She was determined to keep her head up and not let Lorent know how much he’d hurt her. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. She’d continue her lessons with him on Monday, get through them as quickly as possible, and that would be that.

  She huffed out, “Men,” to the empty room before petting Puss’s head.

  Too bad her heart didn’t agree with her on that theory. She wasn’t sure she’d ever completely get over Lorent, but she’d have to. If Shannon wanted him, she could have him. But as she drifted to sleep, her brain argued with her once again traitorous heart over that point.

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  Chapter Fourteen

  She looked down and was surprised to find she was walking through the snow in nothing but a pink nightgown, yet she wasn’t cold. She must be dreaming again. It was the only explanation why she wasn’t freezing her ass off and frostbite wasn’t setting in on her bare feet. She’d never had such vivid, strange dreams before she’d come to Sanctuary.

  She shrugged and kept walking, not sure where her subconscious was leading her, but too intrigued to care. She was in the forest again, and the ground was covered with fluffy white snow. She smiled as she looked up through the trees, the bright moon casting a soft glow upon her face. It was a beautiful sight, and it was eerily quiet.

  “Melony?”

  She spun around, right into Lorent’s broad chest, and gasped when his arms came around her to steady her. Why was she dreaming about him again? Wasn’t she mad at him? Yes, but “the heart wants what it wants” wasn’t just a saying. It was the truth.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked as if she had a reason to be angry at the image her own brain had fabricated for this dream. After all, could she blame him when she’d been the one who’d conjured him? He wasn’t real, after all.

  The answer to that was yes. She could still be angry at him even if he was only a figment of her subconscious, and she was too stubborn to admit that only meant she was mad at herself.

  “I needed to see you.”

  “Why don’t you go see Shannon?” She raised a brow, hoping the expression on her face adequately supported the sarcasm of her question.

  “I don’t want to see Shannon. I only want to see you.”

  “Didn’t seem that way to me.”

  “It wasn’t what you think.”

  She sighed and pulled away from him. “It doesn’t really matter anyway, does it? It’s not like we’re married or anything. You can do what you want.”

  She started to walk away, but he gently pulled her back to him, nuzzled his nose against her hair, and took a deep breath while she fought the urge to lean against him.

  “It does matter, and I’m not into Shannon. I never have been. She was upset, and she was crying. I was trying to comfort her. That’s all there was to it. I swear.”

  “I get all confused around you, Lorent. You make me feel things I’ve never felt before.”

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  “It’s the same for me,” he whispered.

  “It’s a little scary how much I’ve grown to care for you in such a short amount of time.

  It doesn’t seem possible, and I don’t quite know how to handle the emotions.”

  He chuckled before kissing the top of her head. “Believe me when I say I understand completely.”

  She looked up at him. “But that’s just it. It’s hard enough trying to understand my feelings, but trying to figure yours out as well is impossible.”

  “I’m sorry. I’m not good at this communication thing. Can’t you be patient with me?”

  Her shoulders slumped in defeat. “You need to talk to me. It’s time. It’s past time.”

  When he didn’t respond, she sighed. “Look, I’ll make this easy for you. Your choice. I won’t hold it against you whatever you decide. If you care for me like I care for you, you’re going to have to trust me at least a little. I’ll admit I’m scared for the future, because honestly? If I fall in love with you, and I’m halfway there already, I don’t know what I’ll do if your mate or mine shows up one day.

  “But I can’t deny what I feel for you any longer. There has to be a reason we were brought together, even if I’m not your mate. Please, Lorent, can’t you open up to me about your past?”

  “I’ll think about it. There is so much I want to tell you, so much I need to tell you, but I’m not proud of a lot of it, and it won’t be easy for me. In fact, I should probably just tell you all of it, because once you hear, you won’t want to have anything to do with me anymore anyway.”

  “Lorent! Whatever you did and whatever happened in your past is just that. In your past. I promise I will not judge you for the things you’ve done. We’ve all made mistakes.

  We all deserve to be forgiven, and we all deserve a second chance. I don’t know how to show you I mean that unless you trust me enough to share with me.”


  He shook his head. “It’s not that simple. It’s not like I was the school bully and was mean to some kids and then grew up. The things in my past are horrible.”

  She reached up and framed his face with her hands. “We all have things we are ashamed of. You’re no different than anyone else. The only thing that makes you different is your obvious refusal to forgive yourself for your past. If you can’t forgive yourself, you couldn’t possibly think anyone else could, right?”

  He nodded in agreement.

  “Oh, baby.”

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  Hot tears spilled down her cheeks. He had so much pain, so much guilt, so much regret locked up inside him, eating away at him. She wanted to help him, to comfort him, to take some of the pain away from him if he’d just let her. She placed her hand over his heart. “You’re a good man, Lorent. Trust me. Let me help you heal.”

  And just like that, he was gone.

  * * * *

  She opened her eyes, surprised to find her cheeks wet with tears. Most of her anger had drained away, and her heart ached for Lorent, and flip-flopped when she realized that she’d already fallen in love with him. There was no going back now. Not for her. She’d love him forever, even if he chose not to love her back, even if they ended up going down different paths in life.

  “Great.” She cuddled against Puss. “How am I going to get him to open up to me, Puss?” The cat started purring against her, and she smiled.

  Suddenly, she knew she had to get him to trust her, because the dream had not just been a dream. It had been a message. She had to help Lorent.

  The only way they could possibly have a future together was if she could find a way to make him understand it was okay to forgive himself.

  “How in the heck am I supposed to get him to do that?”

  * * * *

  The next few days flew by. The snow continued to fall, although it had slowed in pace and mostly fell lazily. Melony had never seen such huge snowflakes, and the longer she was at Sanctuary, the more she liked it. She’d lucked out in getting a connection on the Internet to check her order status, and was pleased to see that her supplies would be delivered in town later in the week.